[song? quite bitter beings- cky ]
[mood? hardcore.]

ok, to explain my mood, i wanna go headbang and break stuff. this song ALWAYS makes me feel like that. yea... its so kickass!!! YEA! *goes to some metal concert and comes back* those ppl were scary... i dont feel hardcore anymore. *wimpers*

well... anyway. today sucked. i couldnt go to wny. i get to go tomoro tho. :D well yea. so.. tomoros gunna rock. but today, all i did was read, throw up, eat, and cry. yea... today was pretty boring. i was stuck in the house all day... i think. i forget. wait.. no. i emerged from my cave once. to go eat philipino food with mum. it tasted good, but i couldnt eat any of it cuz my teeth r too weak. yea, i kno, its pathetic. BUT WAIT AND SEE!! when i get my braces off... oh.. you'll all be DAZZILED by my crazy movie-star, perfect, white, straight smile. its gunna be so great. :D :D :D :D :D

well yea. thats pretty much it. ummmm.... i love izzy. i love him SOOOOOOOO much. :D thats all i have to say ppl.

I LOVE YOU IZZY

(im gunna be ghetto tonight)
PEACE!

[song? bathwater- no doubt]
[mood? hyper and sleepy]

hey... i read today. i read. and then i fell asleep in the middle of reading... that was bad. but i got some reading done... and that was very good. i only have to read briar rose now.... well along with finishing this book. its quite good actually... and so is briar rose. im gunna use stargirl as my 3rd book. and i already read that... so im home free. and i can just use some OTHER book that i already read as my 4th book. yea. and i have my articles for science. :D :D :D so i should be fine.

im goin to wny tomoro. izzys gunna get his hair cut... and ima go with him. :D i love the feel of new cut hair... its so cool. but yea. things are good. i love my izzy so much... heheh!

well... my teeth hurt. i have to get them checked the DAY school starts. ewwIE! and im hungry... i was eating before but i stopped... psh. i dont NEED food. psh.. food. w/e... i'll probly eat something tomoro. or not... w/e.

btw- did anyone see the notebook? that was such an awesum movie. i saw it while i was at the shore a few weeks ago.

well... thats pretty much it for today

I LOVE U IZZY

and i love my readers too. they all ROCK! :D

night!

[song? the boogie that be- black eyed peas]
[mood? kinda pissed]

PSH.... this is bull. my mom wont let me go to wny tomoro. but... at least i get to go saturday. i cant wait to see izzy :D mmmm... IZZY

im such a doRk! well... right now, im messin with my earings... i think my second hole in my left ear closed... but thats TOO FRICKEN BAD. im gunna make it reopen if i have to make it bleed. i cant just have my piercings CLOSE on me!

today i got stuck in the fuckin house. i had to clean and shit for the ppl that came to look at the house. but yea. thats pretty much all i did. then i had to go to barnes and noble for like... 2 hrs to find all the crap that i need for the summer work. but yea. i got what i needed. tomoro im probly gunna have to read all day so that my mother will drive me to wny to see my beloved. :D haha..

love is a beautiful thing ppl. never underestimate it. love can make blind men see and mute men talk. just maintain hope and faith. if its meant to be, it will work out.

on that note, i think its ironic that i've been stuck in new jersey for.... 7 yrs now. and in the last 4 months of being here, i find the guy im meant to be with. thats so fucked up. i've found true happiness. and for that, i thank new jersey. i have good friends, and a great man here. but the ppl are the only thing in new jersey that i value.

this state has killed the wonder i once had for nature.
this state has killed my cat. the only animal i loved more than some people.
this state has killed my faith in education as a release.
this state has killed what little simplicity i had left.
this state has killed the closeness to my family that i used to be so fond of.

and yet, i do not regret living here even a little bit. i know wonderful people. and they made it all worthwhile. they know who they are. *thank u all*

I LOVE YOU IZZY

g'night pplz. im sorry that this post is so mushy.

y

[song? melt with you- mest ]
[mood? calm and content]

i had subway... it was so kick tush. i've been wanting subway for YEARS... ok maybe not years but DAYS!!! yes. and i finally got it... and it tasted so good.... *sigh* yummmmmmy yummmmmy YUM. :D

welll i got home from alinas today. i had fun today there.... i got to chill with izzy, alina, and steve all day. hehehe. :D alina is a strange lumpkins. steve is a funny lumpkins... and izzy is a SEXY lumpkins! or... SOXY?!?! hmm... lol.... jk. yepp yepp...

hehehe... subway. sorry. i got my schedule. francis is in all my classes but 1st period cycle. sammy has gym with us... he says hes gunna harass me like he did in 6th grade... OOooOO SO SCARY!!! lol... NOT.. mr hill will EAT him!! HAHAHHAHA.... well yepp..

im so mad.. my mom wont let me get pebbles for herbert OR more contacts. goodness. GRRRRR

things with izzy are going well... hes so great to me and perfect and :D im sooo HAPPY. goodness. just being around him is like *AWWWWWW I WUV YOU* hehehe. hes so great... MUAHAHHA. SMOOcH SMoOCH TO IZZY! i love him :D LOTS :D :D :D

mish mash smooshy smash :D :D :D

you all rock... :D

and... BITTEN FROM IZZY-
KISSES! SMOOCHEY!! SMOOCHEY!!!

hey izzy here

[song? ] a new hope-blink 182
[mood? ] sleepy


today was crazy. we started out at my house then migrated to alinas. we got steve, izzy, and ulises and just hung out. we were riding down monroe with a huge fishing pole. then we got to boulevard and got kicked out of the "deed park" by some wack security guard. then we went to izzys, had dinner and made a manual pad. lol... birgit saw the fire in his backyard so we almost got in trouble. alina made up a story on the spot about some bbq or something. and she bought it. hahaha.
so now im here. chewing gum, my eyes hurt.
well pplz... nighty night. i love you all

[song? ] a new hope-blink 182
[mood? ]sleepy


today was crazy. we started out at my house then migrated to alinas. we got steve, izzy, and ulises and just hung out. we were riding down monroe with a huge fishing pole. then we got to boulevard and got kicked out of the "deed park" by some wack security guard. then we went to izzys, had dinner and made a manual pad. lol... birgit saw the fire in his backyard so we almost got in trouble. alina made up a story on the spot about some bbq or something. and she bought it. hahaha.
so now im here. chewing gum, my eyes hurt.
well pplz... nighty night. i love you all god jessa to lazy izzy did this praise me

[song? come out swinging- offspring ]
[mood? GAHHHHHHHHHHH]


hey hey hey. HEY. im here. with alina. and we're at my house. and im talking to izzy... but hes getting mad cuz im not talking enough. AHHH thats y im all freaked out.... hey... did u ppl kno im going out with him now? well yea. i AM and im happy... i hope he is too. :D

yea well life is good. yesterday was great.... yea.. welllllll anyway. i mean GREAT like super awesum. yea yea yea. uh huh. oh and im typing like this cuz im trying to type really fast cuz yea. izzy is waiting. yea. ummmmmmm today... i chilled and slept it was good i didnt really do anything else tho until alina came over. then we went to walgreens and shit. it was... ok. but yea... yepp. my house is boring cuz we're POOR. gah. im not used to this but oh well. i kno. im a spoiled bitch... yepp yepp yepp... and i sorry for that.

herbert is doing good... hes my hermit crab for those of you who dont already know. yea

shit i have to do my summer work this week... all of it. lmfao.... hahahahhaha yes. ALL OF IT. welll not counting the SS i started... but we all did that.. we did that before school ended. yea im scared. our science teached next year talks like a robot and the science woman AND ms sheridan already yelled at me. i think the science thing is ms mariani . w/e i cant spell her name.

i got new mechanical pencils. its crazy theyre .09 mm lead which is CRAZY thick. and i got my math notebook cuz i need it for my summer work. hehehhee. yea. YEA.... well anyway.. im gunna go now. YEP. god its annoying typing like this. i promise u guys i wont do this anymore.

anyway... MY READERS ROCK :D

night ppl. luv ya izzy.

[song? criminal- fiona apple]
[mood? jppy]

mann... today was a pretty good day. i didnt do anything special on a board... i wish i could ollie or SOMETHING... i really have to start practicing. anyway, i pretty much hung out with alina steve and izzy all day. it was loads of fun :D

well anyway. tomoro im gunna chill with my mom and sleep... BUT IM REALLLY EXCITED ABOUT IT :D :D :D its gunna be great... muahhahaha.... YES. im so jppy that its crazy. i thought i messed it all up, but it turned out ok. :D

oh... and i found someone else who hates me today... oh well. i dont hate him, but he hates me. bleh! :(

I LOVE HIM SO MUCH. i got him mad today.. i hope he knows im sorry.... and even tho i dont show it, i DO love you. :*

alright gotta publish
night pplz

DAYS LEFT TO SCHOOL: 13

-and i still havent done any of my summer work... im gunna do it next week. :D

[song? ] "why dont you get a job"- the offspring
[mood? ] calm and happy

hey ppl. im at alinas. BUT I FORGOT HERBERT!!! hes gunna die in the hands of my mother.i just KNOW IT!!! gahhh!!! if he dies... my mom is gunna smack me. i promised her i wouldnt kill him. and now shes never gunna let me get another pet if its not a dog or cat*tear*i hope he'll be fine when i get back on wednesday.i hope he'll be fine when i get back on wednesdaymy mom is probly gunna let him die. and then shes gunna say "JESSA I TOLD U SO. NO FERRET FOR YOU!!!"oh poor herbert. even tho he was a retard, i still loved him.

well today was good. except izzy fwelt bad. which was bad for me. other than him going off, the day was good. well, beside the part where this crazy mexican man looked at my ass. *tear* it was awful... oh well. im gunng try and convince myself that steve was lying to me. but he looked so scared after the man said that... he like. RAN AWAY FROM THE GUY.

other than that, not much happened... so good night pplz.

-many thanx to izzy for posting this for me tho. he rox :D

I LOVE HIM SOOOO MUCH HES SO PERFECT... heheheh i LOOOOOOVE him. :D :D :D

g'night

[song? happy tree friends theme song :D]
[mood? florbant. i bet you dont kno what that means. good. CUZ I DONT EITHER AHHHH]

welll... today was the best day ever. i hung out with HIM all day. it was great. GREAT. oh so great. it was SOOO much fun. no sarcasm or anything. i had a REALLY REALLY great day. mmmm. today was so good. i love today... and HIM. HEHEHEHEHEHHEHHE. it was so crazy. in a good way. :D so happy... so so happy.

welllllllllll. IM SMUSHY!! IM SO SMUSHY BUT YOU LOVE IT!!! I KNOW YOU DO!! !MUAAHAHAHA. ok... just THINKING about today made me like this... ahh! lol

i found emma and amanda today. they were with dillon. hes so adorable. he made out with my knee tho... it was pretty crazy. that boy loves to be spun around... its so cute. that boy is a future skater... he got ahold of a skateboard today, and was ROLLIN... lol... yea right. hes still cute tho.

thats just about it. THATS JUST ABOUT IT!?!?! NOOOOOO.

*commercial break*
~~cheerios commercial "it lowers your cholesterol!!!"~~

hehe... i HATE cheerios. they BLOW. ugh!!! EWWW theyre so nasty!!! well anyway ima go... chill with alina and be sleepy... until we sleep. which will probly b awhile. its ok tho.

ok then. CHEERIO OLD CHAPS!!! hehehe

[song? handle this- sum 41]
[mood? scared oh so scared]

BRACES. TOMORROW. 12 NOON. CRAZY JEW DENTIST. MY TEETH. PAIN... lots and lots of pain. but its ok. IM HAPPY ABOUT IT. when i get my braces off, im gunna bleach my teeth and have perfect straight movie star teeth... and my smile will be DAZZLING and not cuz all the metal in it. its gunna be fabulous. :D :D :D i cant wait. but until then, its gunna b painful... very painful. last time, i came out with a headache, and a fucking plastic plate at the top of my mouth. ugh.

yea... welll... i should b excited about going to the beach tomoro... but im not. i dont like the beach... and normally the boardwalk would b fun, but im gunna b there with myself and a bunch of adults... so thats gunna blow. im gunna try and get a hermit crab... those things rock. MUAHHAA... it would b SOOO much better if HE could come.. damn.. but i dont think my mom would approve. lol... yea. oh well... :(

i get to keep my table until i move. ty izzy. i was too scared to ask alina to keep it for longer... oh well. :D

i cant wait until i can actually skateboard.... thats gunna b so much fun. im gunna try really hard... and its gunna be great. :D MUAHAHHA!!! iM GUNNA TERRORIZE THE CITY!!! ON WHEEEELLLSSS!!!!! hehehehehe

i tried to convince my mom to get us a ferret in cali. ferrets r so cute. she said no... but if i present her with more info, she might say yes. she just needs to be informed of the proper ferret care... man.. those things are ADORABLE. but if i get one, i cant get a cat. so.. im not sure yet. but a ferret would be so awesum... oh well... i have to check that out. :D

man... i got to talk to HIM alot today... HEHEHHEHEHEHEH :D im so happy.. HE MAKES ME SO HAPPY!!! hehehe.... i just wanna SMOOCH him lol... :D

welll..... im out pplz. i hope u all know i luv ya lots. but i love him more :D

[song? wrong way- sublime ]
[mood? content]

today.. was pretty boring. i pretty much slept all day. i helped mum out with the house and stuff.... and then she made me go food shopping by myself. it was terrifying.

i will NEVER go food shopping by myself at stop and shop ever again. i am officially terrified. there were creepy men at the deli and they were really weird. and then the cashier was crying as she was ringing up the groceries... it was scary.

well... anyway. i bought the coolest stuff.... i spent like... $75 on anything i wanted. it was so cool. i got kinda pissed off tho, cuz i couldnt get my new toothbrush. i want a new toothbrush. the one i have is old. BLEH. and i find this messed up. my mom will give me her fricken credit card to go food shopping, but she wont give me 20 to go to walgreens. man.... that BLOWS.

i talked to ppl today. that was good. i talked to HIM today... :D that was VERY good.

and im probly gunna have to do all my summer work from school... i should probly get started on some of that sometime soon. lol...

welll..... TA TA PPLZ

-ps... I LOVE HIM

[song? traces- enigma]
[mood? calm]

man... this song ALWAYS calms me down... its crazy. i thank franshiz for downloadin it on my comp when he was here. *sways with music*

well... yea. today was fun. i slept alot... and then we got izzy from work... and chilled at alinas till like.... 6 when we got steve... and then he took his board away from me after accusing me of fucking it up. which i probly did... oh well. *sorry steve!* and.... then mum came and got me, and here i am.

at alinas, i spent like... the entire time trying to get my hair ties back from izzy... i like tackled him and STILL couldnt get them back... that boy is ridiculously strong. lol...

well... the rest of the week seems action packed. except tomorrow and wednesday. tomorrow and wednesday, i plan to sleep all day... and b online and be lazy. it sounds good to me. if i get really bored, i'll catch up with emma and amanda. on thursday i get my braces in the morning, and go to the shore that afternoon. on friday night, we leave the shore. on saturday, i help mom out with the house all day. BLEH.

man.... my back is itchy... ahhh... there we go *scratches back* :D

well... i talked to ryan today. he was all happy cuz he was chillin with these puerto rican chicks at the beach today. lol... and he had hung out with a hooker all day in queens a while ago. he was so happy... its good when my friends r happy. lol.... even if it WAS hookers that made them happy.

but yea. life is good, i love HIM and thats all. g'night ppLz!

[song? down- good ol' blink 182]
[mood? satisfied]

well... im filthy, exhausted, and i probly smell awful.. but im really happy. today, i got alot better at riding. this time, i... ALMOST kinda.. kept up with alina and izzy. ok. so i was no where NEAR keeping up with them. but im still proud. i only fell 3 times today. lol... im still super slow... but thats too damn bad. they want me to learn, so they have to wait for me to catch up too. damn i need my own board.... oh well. i'll bug mum into buying me one. i do NOT need ppl to get me a board (IZZY)!!!

well... yea today was good. we went down to tonelle and 81st by my old house and rolled around there.... we were so poor.... but... we had many adventures along the way. apparently the starbucks in target doesnt accept starbucks cards... that made me mad. i NEEDED a venti strawberries and cream frap. oh well....

my new vans are loverly. even tho they gave me a blister its cuz theyre new. so i forgive them. alina says they'll wear in, and i rust her so im just gunna stick with em.

and... OMG i get my braces thrusday. ewwie ewwie ewwie. izzys crazy. he thinks braces r cool. everyone else just laughs at me. my poor wittle teeths!!! i hate to think of the pain they will endure this thurday. :(

oh... and my mom.. is crazy. CRAZY.... just thought yall should kno that. :D

MOOSHY MOOSHY... yepp.. thats HIM i *HEART* him... sigh

well... ta ta for now.

[song? this love- maroon 5 ]
[mood? JOYFUL/HAPPY]


god... today was like.. the best day of my life. i went out with HIM today. we went all around clifton... and made out on a bridge... lol... the cars honked it was funny. we just went around and talked... and then we went out to dinner with my mom and she said he was "sweet and charming" she loved him... it was great. i want to live this day over and over and over again
i love him so much.

poor poor alina. shes going crazy. she needs to get over izzy... really she does. i understand she loved him and all, but if he doesnt feel the same way anymore, she should move on.

sammy... i miss him. and francis too. and jamie and becca. i havent seen that bunch in ages. :(

well... i need to publish this

[song? overdrive- katy rose]
[mood? OVERJOYED]

well... today was lazy in the best way. i just chilled at home. hugged my dog. kissed the mom. did the laundry. that type of thing. its good to be home. i missed my chair.... :D i missed the convos with my mom. we had a big one today about religion and philosophy. shes one of the few ppl who arent ignorant. and although her views on the subject are different from mine, we still understand and respect each other. its really cool.

im gunna chill and catch up with her tomoro. umm... dont call or anything unless its important. cuz we might be like... out or something. and i have a nasty habit of forgetting to turn my phone off. so... just be nice and dont call me... lol. no offense ppl!! i cant wait until tomoro.

well... in other news, alina and izzy broke up.... very odd. alinas devastated... poor girl. she needs to get over him tho. izzy is coping pretty well. its a pity she thinks he doesnt care anymore. he DOES... just... he cares for her like a friend now. but... shes like... having a weird breakdown type thing.

well... i heard from emma.. that was good. i told her i was moving soon and the poor thing started crying! :'( but other than that she was good. she told me that samantha held a party at samanthas house with all her ghetto friends, so shes grounded for the rest of the summer and can only hang out with emma. so... emmas pissed cuz shes stuck with sam.... HAHA. sorry emma, i feel for ya.

and i talked to franshiz today. that was good. i missed my guy pal. its good to know hes alive.... lol. and i talked to jamie. and thats pretty much it.

damn... i have like... 60 emails... that i have to check. damnit.

lol.... well... TTYL pplz!!

I LOVE HIM... and i guess my readers too. :D

[song? slip like space- armor for sleep]
[mood? happy, but pissed at my dad]

today was fun fun fun. but then again, almost all my days r fun.... i dont kno y. its just some kind of fun-disorder that i must have. izzy went to work. there were movies at alinas while he did that. then we went with him to the high school with him while he got his schedule. taco bel happened, and then he skated off into the horizon... back to work. lol... but yea. after that he came back, and alina had to go to the fat man. while alina did that izzy and i wandered around. we got alina back and then chilled. we skated around... i borrowed steves board, since he cant use it anyway. alina says she gives me a perfect ten points for trying to skate. i fell on my ass coming around a cornoer tho... oh well. nothings broken. that was at this cool spanish street party type thing that the wny cops held. then, right at the end of alinas block i couldnt resist the urge to skate, and in that minute, i practically ran over izzy. poor guy... i popped something out on his shoulder.. i felt really bad, but its ok now. he said it was better now.

and now, im happy, but otherwise pissed at my good for nothing father because i was just thinking abour all the SHIT that i was put through becuz of him. i unloaded on alina, and i give HER ten stars for patience with me.

i go home tomoro mornin... well.. nighty night ppl

-i LOVE HIM

[song? megalomaniac- incubus]
[mood? mooshy!!!]

i kno u ppl are probly mad about this by now, but im going to tell you what i did today. first, i woke up. then we took izzy to work, and when we got back, i fell asleep while watching movies. i got to see the italian job before i passed out though... i think thats my fav seth green film. its cool... he plays this nerdy hacker guy... hes just so cute lol... but yea. then we got izzy for lunch, chilled in alinas, and then took him back. when he got out of work, we went and chilled around the place.

all of this was without steve... cuz the poor boy is grounded for another 3 weeks. no one can go in or out b/c he wont apologize to his mother for saying that he hated her and wished he could move out after he broke a glass duck that she got. odd story, i know.

after that, we went down to blvd, where izzy and i had a good long chat. he needed to get some things off his chest... alina went over to julios for the 2 hours that i was talking to him. im glad we had that talk... i think we both really needed it.

we came back, hung out, and ended up at izzys house, where he and alina messed with her board. btw- he finally tightened the trucks on his new bam board so now he can ride normally and everything. his "daughter" is ultra cute... she was playing with the wheels on alinas board.... SOOO cute. then we stayed for some really good watermelon... and i dont usually like watermelon. then.............. we pretty much went home after izzy got harassed by some kid who accused izzy of spitting gum on him.... which he DID.... lmao... ita all good tho. still funny. and now izzys takin a bath and im here bloggin. wait... he just got back.

ook... im gunna go blog for izzy.... ttyl pplz

i *heart* HIM

[song? hit the floor, linkin park]
[mood? mooshy!!!]

hot pockets... they rock. i just needed to tell u guys that.

today was... a pissed off day... but good pissed off... like... messing around pissed off.. lol.... i had to be held down like.... 3 times, for different reasons... usually involving steve. lol.... im over it now tho... its all good. there was a computer crisis but it got fixed... and steve had a fight with his mom.... luckily tho, izzy cheered him up by offing hookers in spanish and then giving him a lap dance.... lol. then there was a thing with an ass towel, but we wont get into that.

lol.... alrighty. today was super fun fun. other than that.... i cant remember. but... yea. i go back home tomoro. :(

ook... nighty night night... i LOOVE him and i guess some of you too. lol....

dust homies. lmao.. NO. just dust.